Crash & Burn
by DramaticStarlet
Summary: She thinks she's so great. The sad part? So do I. TessCaitlyn.


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**Title: **Crash & Burn  
**Pairing: **Taitlyn (Tess / Caitlyn)

**Author: **DramaticStarlet / Katie Lynn  
**A/N: **This is my first try at Camp Rock femslash. If it sucks ...well, I can say that I tried my best! (:

I'm saying that Caitlyn and Tess are bisexual or bicurious, not necessarily _just _lesbians. Because personally, I think that Tess probably likes boys as much as she likes girls, and I think Caitlyn is just plain confused as to WHAT exactly she is.

But that's just the image I'm getting.

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She's pretending like she doesn't know me.

Of course she is. That's exactly what I thought she'd do, so I'm not shocked or surprised or offended.

We're strangers now, so it shouldn't matter if we're speaking to or acknowledging one another.

But it does matter. It matters because she broke my heart all those years ago, and never apologized.

Though I never really expected her to apologize; Tess Tyler is way above apologizing, everybody knows that.

I smile and laugh through the perfect couple's – I mean, Shane and Mitchie's – wedding reception, trying not to notice how beautiful Tess looks in her Versace gown.

Sometime between dinner and the cake cutting is when I notice that she brought a date to the wedding. He's tall and dark and handsome. In general, your typical Tess guy. He wears an obviously designer suit, and his face is so perfect that I just want to smack the stupid "I'm here with _Tess Tyler_" smirk off his lips.

Not a hair out of place, with Tess's fair hair and eyes and his dark features, they look annoyingly perfect together.

I remind myself to ask Mitchie about this guy later. She probably knows something about him, unlike me.

Watching Shane and Mitchie's wedding reception play out is an embittering experience for me. I love Shane and Mitchie, really, but I'm so jealous of what they have together.

And what they have is everything that I don't.

During the party, I just stand in a corner and pretend not to exist, until someone comes up to me, in which case I _have _to become social. It's a drag, but I deal.

"Caitlyn, come on. Join the land of the living, won't you?" Mitchie says to me at some point.

"Mitchie, do you know how awkward I feel right now?" I say, a little irate for some reason.

Mitchie sighs and glances over to where Tess stands across the room.

"Five minutes, Cait? Just five minutes, and then you can sulk some more. Please, just do a LITTLE bit of talking? For me and Shane?" my best friend smiles hopefully.

"You're lucky it's your wedding day and I love you," I shake my head and she smiles widely, giving me a big hug.

I just sigh and begin walking around. When I do find a niche where it looks like I'd maybe fit in, it get easier to socialize.

I start out with one group, stay twenty minutes or so, and then move on to the next little clique.

In the last group I'm in, I get to talk with Hannah Montana and Jake Ryan. It's fun, and I even manage to get in a little chatter about producing one of her albums (a little shameless business plug here and there is okay).

It's all going great, and I manage to forget about Tess, but who decides to intrude than Tess herself.

She thinks she's so great.

The sad part? So do I.

"Hi Hannah," Tess smiles.

"Tess! Girl, I haven't seen you in years," Hannah smiles back, and they do that thing where you give each other air kisses.

"Oh, I _know. _And who is this?" Tess turns to me.

I'm speechless for a moment. She's acknowledging my existence...did she forget that we aren't supposed to associate?

"Um, Caitlyn. Caitlyn Gellar," I say to Tess when I finally manage to start forming coherent sentences again.

"It's a pleasure to meet you. Tess Tyler," Tess holds out her hand.

I smirk and raise a quizzical brow before taking her hand.

Something in my hand starts to burn or tingle or both, but I ignore it. This is hardly the time to excuse myself, when I've finally gotten next to Tess for the first time in four years.

I don't _want _to be next to Tess, but then again, I do (and it's moments like these when I know that I'm a masochist).

"I don't know about ya'll, but I'm getting kinda antsy. Honey, let's go take a walk," Hannah says to Jake (who was awkwardly staring down at his shoes), "See you later, Tess, Caitlyn. Oh, Caitlyn, give me a ring about producing, okay?"

"Sure thing," I smile before turning back to Tess, "It's so nice to meet you, Tess."

Tess rolls her eyes; "Cute, Caity, real cute."

I'm suddenly bitter – angry, even – at her use of the pet name I haven't heard in four years.

It doesn't matter that I still harbor feelings for her; all that matters is the fact that she's _really _ticking me off.

"So as soon as no one important is around, you can associate with me. How sweet, how very _considerate_ of you, Tess," I say, swilling down the remainder of my drink.

Tess looks taken aback; "_Fine_. Excuse me, I'm feeling parched. Maybe Leo will get something for me."

She stalks off, and says something to her date. Her date – the prick named Leo – obeys whatever she's told him to do, like he's her lapdog.

Ha.

I'm no longer in the mood to mingle, so I return to my corner and mock people I've talked to.

_Hannah Montana. _That blabbermouth wrote her hit song "11 Things" about her ex-boyfriend and didn't even apologize. Real classy, Hannah.

_Mikayla. _Wannabe. How old is her date, like seven? Geez, she must really be taking her break-up with Mike Standley III really hard. Wonder if it's almost her date's naptime?

_Tess Tyler_ Slut. Slut, slut, slut. Backstabber. Heartbreaker. Cheater. Liar.

It doesn't help to insult other people, it just makes me feel guilty.

"Are you Caitlyn?" some random person asks me when the music starts up, and bodies begin filling up the dance floor.

"Yeah," I raise a skeptical eyebrow.

"I believe this belongs to you," they push some random blonde towards me.

Oh God.

It's Tess.

"Hi, Caitlyn! I've been looking for you everywhere!!" Tess cries, flinging her arms around my neck.

She smells like alcohol and smoke and some expensive perfume – I hate it.

It's just like old times; I get stuck cleaning up her messes. Her messes are never easy to clean up, either.

"You're drunk, aren't you?"

"You have pretty hair," Tess sighs contentedly against my hair, and her breath tickles my ear.

Tess always was a sloppy drunk; unfocused, childish, and clumsy.

"Tess, go home. Get away from me," I hiss, though I don't mean it.

She doesn't move, just sets her head on my shoulder.

I sigh, and drag her into the coat room. She plops down on a chair, and I just crash under the coats.

It would be stupid to leave a tipsy Tess alone.

Tess squeals and jumps up from her chair to sit next to me.

We're silent for a moment, until Tess speaks.

"Why'd you leave?" she asks.

"What?" I looked over at her.

"Why did you leave me?" Tess repeats, her face in a childish pout.

"You told me to," I remind her, trying to sound as emotionless as possible.

"I was lying. I lie a lot. Like when I told Leo or Leon or something he's not stupid, and when I told Mikayla that I loved her new purse," the blonde girl next to me shrugs nonchalantly.

"What else did you lie about?" I ask, though it's wrong to take advantage of her current state. It's _really _wrong, but I do it anyway, because I actually don't care all that much.

Tess shrugs, smiling childishly.

I roll my eyes and shook my head, not really disappointed.

Tess begins to hum a silly tune, and then sings it loudly. There's no words, just _da di dum da dum._

"Tess, stop it," I say, irritably clamping a hand over her mouth.

This only makes her sing even louder and even more off-key.

I look into her watery blue eyes and see not one ounce of the Tess that I knew. All I see is a sea of misery and loneliness.

"Stop it, Tess. You're twenty-three years old. Grow up and quit pulling the same stupid stunts," I say though gritted teeth.

Her singing dies in her throat, and she sobers immediately. She's still intoxicated, though she's no longer the giggling, girlish Tess she was only moments before.

Tess looks down at her hands, and tears begin to swim in her bloodshot blue orbs.

"This is all your fault, Caitlyn," she murmurs.

"It's _my _fault that you got waster? How is that _my _fault, Tess, because I really don't know!" I fume, angry that she was pinning her rash behavior on me.

She looks at me, softly, and I see some of the old Tess returning; "No, Caitlyn. It's your fault that my heart is all broken up in fragments, and I can't fix it."

"You asked me to leave. You said that you didn't love me, that you never really had," my words are thick with bitterness.

"I told you, I was _lying. _I was scared and broken."

"Was? You still are."

She shakes her head, her matted blonde hair sticking to her forehead and cheeks. Even though I'm supposed to be at her, I can't help but think that she looks beautiful, so I tell her so.

Tess stares at me. I stare back.

And before I know what's happening, she's kissing me like it's the only way she can survive.

Lips on lips, chest on chest, hands on cheeks. The kiss is a mess of lip gloss and a blur of colors, a tangle of limbs and tongues.

She runs her fingernails up and down my arm, sending waves of pleasure down my spine. I fight back by removing my lips from hers and pressing them to a pulse point on her neck.

Tess gasps, whispering the word "Caity" like a prayer.

Our hands roman each others' bodies, fingering every curvature, every inch of fabric clothing us.

Each sweet caress feels new, but familiar. It's all so different, but so reminiscent of our previous relationship.

We're going too fast; Tess has always been to hasty for her own good.

"Slow down," I whisper into her ear, and her breath hitches as my own breath comes in contact with her flesh.

She complies, her lips moving more softly against mine, and hands less frantic on my skin.

I can't explain what it's like kissing Tess. There isn't anything nice or easy about this kiss; it's all pent-up frustration and anger and sadness.

Because we both know.

We both know that this embrace means one thing.

_Goodbye._

I'm too busy concentrating on Tess to realize that this is a goodbye kiss.

But as soon I hear, "I'll never forget you, Caity," leave her lips, I know it is. It's a terrible kiss to end a relationship, but it's the only one I got.

She looks at me tiredly, a weak smile and a single tear appearing on her face before she gives me one last kiss.

"Goodbye Tess," I surprise myself by standing up, letting my finger trace over her cheekbones.

I walk away, and _God _does it feel bad. My heart aches, and I want to feel Tess all around me again, but I don't dare turn around. Tess will never be ready for an "us" with me, no matter how long I wait.

It's my job to be big enough for both of us to realize that we just want each other to be happy.

"Hey Caitlyn," I bump into Nate Gray, Shane's brother (and bandmate) on my way back into the reception.

"Oh, Nate," I sniff, trying to hide the tears gathering at the corners of my eyes.

"Are you okay, Cait?" Nate asks, wrinkling his brow in confusion.

"I'm – I just, I really need a friend right now," I say sadly.

I like Nate – like him a lot – and he went through something similar to me when him and Peggy were an item. He knows what it's like to hurt so badly that you feel like you'll never heal again.

He can read my eyes, I know he can. "C'mon. Would you like to dance?"

I smile a watery smile before nodding, "Yeah."

We go back into the reception, and slow dance to a song that I produced.

My eyes flood with tears when I see Tess saying goodbye to Shane and Mitchie. I set my head on Nate's shoulder, and let them fall; he doesn't mind.

Caitlyn Gellar doesn't usually crash and burn.

Right now, though, I don't really feel like Caitlyn Gellar.

And I'd give anything to be anyone other than Caitlyn Gellar.

--

My first Taitlyn! Wow, I can't believe I had enough motivation and inspiration to finish it. I thought for sure I'd give up.

Yes, I did throw in a shameless Naitlyn plug. I couldn't help myself. (:

I hope to write more CR femslash in the future, but not for a while. This was HARD.

**Please review with more than "so sad!" or "i loved it," thanks!**


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